


Hentai Boyz

by PandoraButler



Series: My Dirty Little Secret Collection [2]
Category: Durarara!!, Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Don't Judge Me, I wrote it a long time ago, Killing Stalking - Freeform, M/M, boy band, full of the me to me meme, i can't remember if it's nsfw tbh, sangwoo is sangwoo, they aren't major so i didn't add them as characters but they still traumatizing, this is crack there is no other way to put it, yoonbum is yoonbum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2019-02-05
Packaged: 2019-10-22 00:22:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 14,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17652500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PandoraButler/pseuds/PandoraButler
Summary: This is what happens when these four (Victor, Yuuri, Yurio, Otabek) decide they want to create a band. And then, a certain someone (Chris) overhears their conversation and blackmails them to join...





	1. One| Never Daydream in Class, okay? Okay.

His name is Yuri Katsuki. No, no, not the one in the picture. The picture is of Victor Nikiforov aka  _the hottest guy in college_. It's completely understandable why a certain individual  _cough cough_  Yuri _cough_  might have this picture. Everyone does. And if they say they don't, well, obviously they are lying. This guy gets around town (no, not in  _that_  way, baka...although I wouldn't be surprised if it was  _that_  way tbh). In any case, the main character here is Yuri. The little glasses-wearing potato chip in the back of the class. Victor sits right in front of him. This can be a good thing, or a bad thing, depending on the day.

Today, it was a bad thing (matter of opinion, but who am I to judge?).

Why? You ask?

Well, because a certain someone  _cough cough_ Yuri  _cough_  was having a  _'splendid'_  daydream involving the  _extremely_ good-looking Victor. 

_Kisses. One by one. From neck to collarbone. From collarbone to chest. From chest to torso. From torso to... *ahem* *Narrator decides to skip ahead for the sake of the purehearted*_ _With their clothing discarded and left to the floor, Yuri had no choice but to submit to his selfish desires. Eros. What did that word mean? Was it to be dominated? Or to dominate? He couldn't decide. He just went with the flow. The natural order. And, the natural order was telling him to give up the little control of his body he had left..._

_"Yuuri," Victor's voice was low. It was enticing. Yuuri shivered. Was he about to be eaten by his beloved? He held no objections,_ _"are you ready?"  the Russian asked. Yuuri had but one answer..._

"Oh God,  _yes_ ," Yuuri blushed and quickly slapped a hand over his mouth. Had he said that out loud? Yes, yes he had. And who was standing right before him? Staring at him? Completely in shock? None other than Victor Nikiforov. Good job.  _Good_   _job!_ Proud of you. *thumbs up* Go make a fool of yourself! *slow claps* Ah, but, you already did.

"That's great! So, I'll see you later, yeah?" Victor smiled. Yuuri blinked. What? What just happened? What had he agreed to? No! No there will be no 'seeing of the later'! He wasn't mentally prepared for that!

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Uhm, how are you **not**  mentally prepared for that? Did you not just imagine a certain *ahem*  **something** going on? Or was that someone else? It was you. You know it was you._

Yuuri: _Listen, I know very well what I was thinking. But that was that. This is this. Two separate things. Just because I was off in my fantasy-world doesn't mean I can have that fantasy slip into my everyday life._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _How do you think fantasy becomes reality? Idiot._

Yuuri shook his head, attempting to silence his inner Yuuri. Before the words of refusal could escape his mouth, he realized that Victor was already gone. A cackle could be heard next to Yuuri. Yuri Plisetsky. Or, as Yuuri liked to say, 'Plz-let's-ski.' It was hard to stop once you started, and the blonde male hated it every single time. Almost as much as 'Yurio.' It's a hard life when your best friend happens to have the same name as you...you have to differentiate  _somehow_. And, we all know that Yuri is cute. Do you know what happens to cute people?  _They_   _get the nicknames_. 

"Your gay ass don't even know what it agreed to," Yuri bent over in laughter. When he spoke, his words were a turn-off for most people. He didn't mind. It just so happened to be a great way to weed-out the people talking to him. Were you talking to him because he was cute? Or because you  _actually wanted to know the guy_? Throw a few foul words into your speech, mix up the grammar, glare a lot, and  _BAM_  no one likes you anymore! This master plan hasn't failed him yet. 

"Please, Yurio, you have to tell me what just happened!" Yuuri grabbed the shoulders of Yuri. He looked into his eyes with a plea, similar to that of a wounded animal. 

"Get on your knees and beg before the Rightful Yuri, you swine. Then, maybe I'll tell you," Yuri smirked. Yuuri sniffled. His only hope, and now, it was gone. He could feel his soul slowly leaving his body. What should he do? What could he  _possibly_  do to escape making a fool of himself before Victor?!

He had no choice. He had to beg before the Rightful Yuri. Throwing away the last of his pride, Yuuri knelt on the ground before his savior. He folded his hands, as if to pray, and spoke, "oh, great and powerful Rightful Yuri. Please, my one true savior, tell me the conversation that just took place while I was a heathen. Please. I beg of thee."

"Wow, Yuuri, are you auditioning for a play?" that slick voice. No. No. God. If there is a God. Please. No. Tell me it isn't so. Is that...it is isn't it... _Victor._

Yuuri, the tomato-faced moron, jumped off the floor and ran away full speed. No time to look back. He had just made a fool of himself. Well, at least now he didn't have to worry about doing that later! Good job Yuuri! A+! But, what was this? Victor was chasing after him! What logic is that? (I'll tell you what logic. It's the wonderful logic of Author-Chan using secret move: 'Chapter Speed-up Button') 

"Wait! Yuuri! I forgot to tell you when and where we need to meet up!" Victor called after the Yuuri that ran. Poor Yuuri. He just wanted to have a wet dream in class, was that too much to ask? And now, he had gotten the  _real_  Victor instead! That meant they would become _friends_. And being  _friends_  meant Yuuri would get  _friendzoned_  and then he would have to  _hide in a pit of despair because that is where all the 'friendzoned' people go._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Hah! Fool! You went and failed big time!_

Yuuri:  _I knowwwwwwwww. T-T_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Time to activate Ultimate Yuuri! *threatens to press button on the control center of Yuuri's brain*_

Yuuri:  _You wouldn't dare_...

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Yeah, you're right. I should save that for another time..._

Yuuri was running out of energy. He silently cursed himself for eating a bag of potato chips instead of a healthy dinner last night. Stupid self. You need to eat healthier or you're going to gain a bunch of weight again. Do you want to relive that 'High-School Yuuri' era? No, thank you.

Panting, Yuuri hid in a bathroom stall. No point in going out there again. However, he should have known, there was no escape from Victor Nikiforov. The stall door opened, Yuuri had cornered himself. Perfect. Why didn't you lock the stall door? Idiot. 

"I was starting to think that you were going to cancel our plans," Victor smiled, with malice hidden behind it. The average person wouldn't be able to tell, but, Yuuri Katsuki wasn't the  _average_ person. No. He was the  _'I've stalked this man since the moment I've laid eyes on him'_  person. Yep. That's right. Posters. Lots of 'em. He even had locks of hair in a diary someplace, (like, maybe, under his pillow as a peace offering to the Dream Fairies for a good night sleep).

"W-what? What m-made you t-think of t-that?" Yuuri looked everywhere but Victor's face. Ceiling. Floor. Yuuri's sweaty hands. Victor's clothes. Victor's shoes. Victor's dic- *ahem* Victor's, er, not shoes...

Victor took a step closer, entering the stall completely now, the door clicked behind him. Locked. Well, either this is heaven, or this is hell. Victor grabbed Yuuri's chin and forced it up.  _Look into my eyes_. Yuuri thought for sure Victor was saying that. So, he appeased the goddess Vicchan, and looked into Victor's eyes.  _Definitely hell._

"Are you nervous?" Victor whispered. A few other people had entered the bathroom. Yuuri felt a drop of sweat run down his face. Yes. He was nervous. Was that a problem? Victor had just entered this  _incredibly small space_  with him. Why? Because some people entered the bathroom? Did that make sense? Or, was Victor using that as an excuse to get closer to Yuuri? Maybe it was a bit of both. Or, maybe Yuuri was off dreaming of another place. 

Yuuri:  _That's right. This isn't reality, it's one of my dreams. That's fine then, isn't it?_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _*causally presses Ultimate Yuuri button*_

Yuuri smirked, "me? Nervous? Shouldn't  _you_  be the nervous one?" Victor blinked and let go of Yuuri's chin. In that short amount of time, Yuuri stood up, and pinned Victor to the stall's door, "you were safer, holding onto my chin," Yuuri licked his lips as he continued to make direct eye contact with the Russian male. 

_Snap. Crack. Thump._

"You two are so fucking gay," Yuri said. He stood there, in the bathroom, pointing at the two, who were now on the floor for the world to see, (Yuri was talented at finding his best friend, so he didn't even  _need_  to run after Yuuri). The breaking of the stall's door had caused the two males to fall into a kiss. It was just a small moment. Just a little brush of flesh against flesh. 

Backup energy activated, Yuuri jumped up and ran, full speed, away from that bathroom. He ran all the way to his car, and drove away. Sorry, Victor, but, no date today. Or ever. This was reality, crappy reality. Why did he just act like that? 

"I'm going to transfer, or, better yet, I'm going to dropout of college," Yuuri muttered to himself, regretting all of his life's choices.


	2. Two| *Is Secretly An Ax-Murderer*

"Excuse me?" Yuuri, who had no choice but to question the statement being made, did just that. Victor couldn't be serious, right? For what possible reasons, (other than the obvious fact that he is homo for the boy) could Victor actually  _want_  to make a band? And have  _Yuuri_  be a part of it?

"You're acting as if you don't even  _remember_  the conversation we had yesterday!" Victor pouted, "you already agreed! No takebacksies!" Yuuri tried his best to comprehend the conversation without having his mind travel back to the events of yesterday. It was too much surviving it  _yesterday_. He didn't need that again!

Yuuri:  _Hello, my name is Yuuri Katsuki. I didn't just make a fool of myself in front of my long time crush, Victor Nikiforov, yestereday. Nope. That didn't happen yesterday. This is a new day. This is a new me. Watch out world, Yuuri Katsuki is reborn!_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Yeah, right..._

Yuuri:  _Please, let me live my life in peace._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Ha! What life?!_

Yuuri:  _T-T This is exactly why we can't have nice things. You're always being mean to me._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _But I am you._

Yuuri:  _This is my mind. I can do what I want. I can say what I want. And you are going to stfu before I make you._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Well make me then, bitch._

Yuuri:  _*takes out the ax* Say that again you lil' shit._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _*gulps*_

"Well, now that this is settled and you are joining my band," Victor smiled, "you'll need to help me find a few more good-looking members. What about your friend? Would he be interested?" Did Victor just call Yuuri good-looking? Or indirectly say that Yuuri wasn't good-looking and they needed more people that were? Yuuri couldn't tell. One thing was clear though, he couldn't back out of joining this 'band' of Victor's. So sad. Much tears. The audience will mourn this with you, (not really. The audience wants more of Ultimate Yuuri. Ain't that right? And the only way to get Ultimate Yuuri is by forcing the current Yuuri out of his comfort zone i.e. joining Victor's band.).

"What friend?" was Yuuri's immediate answer. He had no friends, that he knew of. Why else would he be a stalk- I mean, *ahem* 'observer.'

"The blonde angry one. You always sit next to him so I thought you two were close," Victor frowned. He must be wondering if Yuuri had lost his mind. Right now Yuuri would be wondering if Yuuri lost his mind. In fact, he does, constantly, every single day. When the only person you have to talk to is yourself, things get a bit complicated.

"Yurio?" Yuuri tilted his head to the side and thought long and hard about this. Yuri? Joining the band? The band that Yuuri himself knew nothing of? Well, that seems... _fun_. Yuuri's lips turned upwards to form a dark grin, "I know the perfect way to get him to join. It requires lots of rope, gags, and maybe a camera."

"Are we going to throw someone in the basement of the school and start singing Killing Me Softly?" Victor sweatdropped, "because, you really look like Sangwoo right now."

"What? No. Of course not," Yuuri's grin remained, "everyone knows you keep them in  _your own basement_ ," he laughed evilly to himself and began walking away, "and then you leave them there for the plot of Attack on Titan. Poor Eren. You're going to find a few thousand dead bodies when I'm done..."

"Please tell me you're joking. You're joking, right?" Victor laughed, albeit nervously. Yuuri snickered. Was he joking? The world may never know. The true surprising thing here is that at the mention of Yurio, Yuuri forgot about Victor being there and started acting more like himself instead of the nervous hamster he was, (or the mental killer that he is). 

"Oh, Yurio!~" Yuuri kicked open the door to the school's personal library. No one was there at this time, except two people, so it was fine. Even the  _librarian_  had deserted this place. This was a good thing though, because that made it the perfect place for Yuri hide, not that he was hiding for any  _particular_  reason. Baka. He just wanted some quality time with his, er, 'tutor' Otabek, (aka  _Yuri's_ long time crush. Yep. That's right. The two Yuris have had many girl-talk sleepovers about which Yuri-Crush was the best crush.).

Yuuri waltzed over to the table where the two sat, textbooks open, and smiled in the best way he could manage without looking like an ax-murderer, (he failed epicly), "I think you want to join our band." Notice how he said 'our' instead of 'Victor's.' That's right folks. Yuuri has already accepted his fanfiction fate of being forced to interact with his crush, Victor Nikiforov. *crowd slow claps*

Yuri didn't even look up from the work he was doing, "hell no."

"Can I join?" Otabek asked, right after Yuri initially refused. Never before had Yuri changed his mind so quickly...

"Hell yes," Yuri looked up at Otabek, "welcome to the band," he said, holding out his hand for a shake. Otabek ignored the gesture. Yuri pouted, internally, and slowly placed his hand back where it was before, holding his pencil.

Yuuri turned to Victor, grinning happily like an idiot, "two for the price of one," he announced. Victor smiled back, with an equally as idiotic grin.

"What is this about forming a band?" a certain, lovable, and highly energetic male entered the crime scene. Did I say crime scene? Heh. Heh. Heh...I meant library...heh...maybe...teehee...

"Chris, hi," Yuuri greeted. He jumped when the male came out from behind a bookshelf. There should only be two people in the library at this time. When had Chris even walked in? Or was he always there? Someone like Chris should be easy to spot, theoretically. 

"I'm forming a band!" Victor raised his hands in the air, only to conveniently wrap them around the unsuspecting Yuuri, and force the male into a hug, (all according to plan). Victor rested his chin on Yuuri's shoulder, "you can't join though. I only wanted  _four_  members," Victor stuck his tongue out. Truth of the matter was, he didn't initially care how many members there were or would be, but, Victor felt like two ships were enough for their future fans.

"Oh?" Chris smiled, "I think you should let me join."

"Don't wanna," Victor pouted.

"Too late. I'm joining and that's final," Chris had no intentions of backing down.  _Someone_  had to make sure that these ships  _actually sailed._ Right? He was accepting this great responsibility, and there was nothing Victor could do about it.

"Mama," Victor whined, "tell him he can't join! This is our child!" 

"Who's 'Mama'?" Yuuri asked, "is that me? Since when did I turn into Kyoya? Is this a Host Club now? I thought this was a band..."

"Can he be Mori?" Yuri asked, pointing to Otabek, "I'll be gangster Honey."

"Then who does that make me?" Chris asked.

"Renge," both Yuris replied at the same time. 

"But if he is Renge, that means he is crushing on Kyoya! Papa doesn't like this!" Victor frowned, bringing Yuuri closer in their embrace.

"I think you mean 'daddy,'" Chris winked.

"You aren't even a part of the band yet. Don't start making pervy jokes," Yuri glared.

"I  _am_ a part of the band. Thank you very much. And if I'm not a part of it," Chris pointed to Victor, "I'm leaking those photos," he then pointed to Yuri, "and I'm catnapping all of your cats."

Yuri abruptly stood up and gasped, "you wouldn't dare..."

"I know very well that I  _would_  dare."

Victor, not responding to the threat of photos leaked, nodded in approval, "welcome to the band!" he smiled. No need to cast him out now! Can't risk those pictures! Can't risk the safety of Yuri's cats! He had to just accept Chris into this group! For the good of the cause! And so, the five males began their journey of creating this so called 'band.' God help us all...


	3. Three| How To Make A Band Name. By Yuuri Katsuki

The 'band' had continued to meet in the school's library on their free days, (which was often, considering none of them had busy schedules). Even though they had spent a lot of time together, they hadn't actually done any band-like activities. The whole scenario was just a glorified study group. Yuri would be asking Otabek school-related questions, while Yuuri, Victor, and Chris all molested each other in the background. No biggie. Just life. On the bright side, Yuuri was slowly becoming more 'normal' around Victor. He felt more confident talking to the male. Now, that doesn't mean he isn't a blushing mess anymore, because he is, it just means he is  _isn't as much_ of a blushing mess. 

"Okay, we need to come up with a band name," Victor slammed his hand down on the table to get everyone's attention. Today, the group was sitting at a round table, near the back of the library, behind rows and rows of bookshelves. Yuuri was on Victor's right and Chris on his left, while Otabek and Yuri were sitting across from Victor, (with a bunch of imaginary friends to sit in the empty chairs).

"First things first. Is anybody here  _straight?_ " Victor questioned. Nobody raised their hands, "well that makes this easy. Our band name is Yaoi Boyz. With a 'z' because it's cool," Victor crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair. That was simple enough. Now all they needed were the roles of the band members. Plus instruments and such. Victor was obviously the leader, since this was  _his_  idea to begin with, so he could be the main singer and songwriter, for the most part, unless someone was better at either of those things than himself.

"As much as that is true, it kind of makes us a bit obvious, no?" Chris said, "shouldn't we at least  _try_  to be a little more considerate of the female audience? Since, that is likely where most of our fans would come from."

"Ha!" Yuri mocked laughter, "if anything it would  _increase_  our female audience! Girls love that gay shit!"

"So, basically, we want to be a fanservice band?" Yuuri sweatdropped, "I don't think I'm exactly...sexy enough...for that," Yuuri fixed his glasses, feeling awkward. Well, don't worry Yuuri, as soon as we release that Ultimate Yuuri. You'll be sexy enough, I promise. Just have to find a way to bring him out of the depths of your mind. It happened before. It can happen again.

"The band name sucks," Yuri said, ignoring Yuuri, "pick a new one."

"What if we just call ourselves Hentai Boyz?" Yuuri suggested, "it's a little more catchy and it makes more sense. Since, I mean, hentai is short for 'hentai seiyoku' which basically translates to 'perverse sexual desire.' So we won't be specifically homosexual in our name...but rather...uhm... _eros_? I guess? Anyway, yaoi is a type of hentai, so, the name still works, yeah? Plus it'll give us more room for creativity. With costumes...like say we wanted to have the theme be yuri one concert or something...and all dressed up as girls...not that I'm saying we should do that! It was just an example!" Yuuri rambled on trying to explain himself. He wasn't used to talking this long and having people  _listen_  to what he was saying. It was weird. 

"Are you saying we call ourselves the 'perverted hot guys'? And have whatever audience we manage to get yearn after us? Like dogs chasing a bone on a string? But we don't just end it there? We use our bodies full force to capture their burning desire for us? And that's it? That's our band's theme? Eros? Sexual yearning? Perverse love?" Chris questioned.

"Y-yes?"

"I'm in," Chris nodded in approval. Well that didn't take much. 

"It has to be Boyz...with a 'z'....that's my only request at this point," Victor began, "and our logo has to be hot pink with a kiss emoji. I will not accept anything else," he finished. Otabek refused to say anything. Did he even have an opinion? Or was he just casually there? In the background? He didn't seem remotely interested in anything that happened, (but he didn't not seem interested either). Maybe, he was just  _too_  obsessed with everything to even  _think_  about refusing an idea. Nah. That can't be right. 

"We are never going to be popular," Yuri rolled his eyes. 

"So you want a logo like this?" Chris held up a picture he drew in under a minute. The letters were bubbly and swirly with a giant kissing emoji between the two words. You could really taste the rainbow with that fine piece of art.

"Chris, you can draw?" Yuuri asked.

"Yes, I can do a lot of things with my hands," Chris deadpanned. Victor snickered, as if he knew  _all too well_  how good Chris was with his hands. Yuuri's poor, (not so) innocent soul began to blush furiously and look at his own hands. Victor noticed this and brought the conversation back the band.

"Can anyone here play an instrument?" Victor asked.

"Is mayonnaise an instrument?" Yuuri couldn't help himself from asking that question. It was in his blood. There was no stopping it. Who  _hasn't_  wanted to say that at some point? There aren't many times when it's a use-able question...

"Calm down Hijikata," Yuri spoke, "I know for a fact that you can play the piano."

"You can play the piano Yuuri?" Victor looked towards the male next to him, his eyes shinning with hope.

"A l-little bit?" 

"That's great!" Victor smiled, "can anyone else play an instrument?"

"Bass guitar," Chirs said.

"Drums," Otabek said, (wow. First thing he has said this entire time. Proud of you Otabek! You finally included yourself in the conversation!).

"Electric guitar," Yuri said.

Victor was almost brought to tears. He really had a band coming together! His childhood dream was being accomplished! This was wonderful! Now, how were they going to see what they sounded like playing instruments together? Victor could semi-write music, he'd had a lot of time to practice that feat...but what if they didn't blend well as an actual band? Then what? 

Well, then, I guess they all would have to practice their hearts out, wouldn't they? Because Victor wasn't about to let his dream fail, not when he had gotten this far...


	4. Four| We're Going On Vacation!

"Yuuri! I heard your family runs a hot spring back in Japan!" Victor ran up to Yuuri in the hallway of Schlittschuh University. He smiled and slung his arm over Yuuri's shoulder. This was a normal event for the glasses-wearing male, and he wasn't sure how he felt about it. Just a few weeks ago he would have been hiding in the corner  _wishing_  that he could talk to Victor. Just a few weeks ago the two were strangers. Should he be happy they now talk on a normal basis? Or should he still be fearing the horrid 'friendzone' that he was fated to experience?

"Yeah, they do. It's a shame I won't be able to see them over spring break. I was looking forward to that hot spring! Nothing is quite like the sweet memories of home, you know?" Yuuri sighed. He had been trying to save up enough money for a plane ticket, but he just couldn't do it. Why did he decide to take so many classes? With all that homework, how was he supposed to go to his job? Tch. The life of a college student is a miserable one. What were they expecting him to be? A multi-millionaire ice skater? No thanks. He can't even  _dance_ , let alone be famous in some  _sport_. The only thing he had to look forward to was the glorified study group sessions, but he couldn't expect everyone to still go to those over break. Sigh. Yuuri isn't going to have a good time...

"What do you mean? I've just booked our flights!" Victor held up his phone to show Yuuri.

"Y-you did what?!" Yuuri stared in disbelief. Where did he get the money for  _five_  plane tickets? Roundtrip? And why  _five_?

"I thought it would be great for Hentai Boyz to take a vacation together! We have to get to know each other real well for this band to work out. A week long hot spring adventure would be good for us! Plus, you can show us the wonders of Japan! Do you think your parents would give us a discount?"

Yuuri:  _Knowing my mom, she will probably let you all room for free and close up shop just so you aren't disturbed while in the hot spring...not to mention the fact she will insist on cooking for everyone._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _I can't even deny that. But, shouldn't you be more concerned? You went and blabbed all about how much you love Victor Nikiforov to your mom...she is totally going to spill the beans..._

Yuuri:  _I'm going to die. I've accepted this fact._

"I don't see why not," Yuuri replied. A phone vibrated in his pocket, speak of the devil. Reader, imagine this for a moment: Yuuri, taking his phone out of his pocket, realizing it was his mom, then trying to slide it back into his pocket. Victor, seeing that it was Yuuri's mom, sliding  _his own hand_  into Yuuri's pocket,  _carefully massaging that fine leg_   _so that he could take the phone out,_ and then answering it. Because yes. That really did just happen. But it doesn't end there. Victor,  _brushing against Yuuri's hand while his hand was still in that pocket_. This is big enough for Yuuri to write about in his Victor Diary later, (he is lying if he says he doesn't have one. Every human on the planet has one. Don't try to tell me otherwise).

"Hello? Yuuri's mom?" Victor paused. Yuuri couldn't hear what his mom was saying, but it didn't matter, his heartbeat quickened in anticipation. What would she say? What would Victor say? Would this madness be allowed to continue? Yuuri's thoughts ran wild. He wouldn't be able to hear the phone over his own mind. "I'm Victor Nikiforov! Your son's boyfriend! Is it okay if he and I, along with a few others, come to visit you over our spring break?" yet another pause began. Yuuri wondered if time was purposefully slowing down, just so he could feel the suspense, "great! See you then!~" 

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Dude. He just said 'boyfriend.'_

Yuuri:  _I'm well aware. Please don't remind me. I'm certain that was just my imagination._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _But I heard it too..._

Yuuri:  _In case you haven't noticed, we are the same person. Of course you heard it too._

Victor hung up and placed the phone back into Yuuri's pocket, "she said it's fine! Now we just have to convince the others to go too!" Victor smiled. Why did his smile have to be as bright as the sun itself? Yuuri was a creature of the darkness. Having so much light in his life was quite distressing. How long would it be until he turned to ashes?

"What mad schemes are you planning this time?" Chris asked, walking over to the two.

"We're going to Japan! Yuuri's family owns a hot spring!" Victor explained.

"'We're'? As in, all five of us?" Chris raised an eyebrow. Victor removed himself from Yuuri and brought himself closer to Chris. He leaned forward, to whisper into the other male's ear without Yuuri overhearing.

" _Yes, and if you decide to skip out I'll have your head on a stick outside my house. Do your best to convince the others, okay?_ " 

"By any means necessary?" Chris muttered. Victor didn't say anything, but his eyes told Chris all he needed to know. 

Victor turned back to Yuuri and waved goodbye, "see you soon!~" he said, before running off someplace. Yuuri wondered if Victor was going to find Yuri and Otabek, or if he was just going home. What  _did_  Victor do in his free time? Why had he never thought to follow Victor outside of school? And figure out what his hobbies were? 

"This is going to be an interesting experience," Yuuri sighed, readjusting his glasses and mentally cursing himself for not being a better stalker.

"Tell me about it," Chris sighed too. Why did  _he_  have to be the one to make sure Yuri and Otabek didn't refuse? Victor seemed to have it all under control! Yuuri and Chris sighed in unison. 

"You know, I honestly regret my decision to not become a stripper. I could have worked in a cute little bar with the name of something Swedish. What was it called? I can't remember. It started with an 'S'" Chris looked off into the distance. Yuuri wanted to help him out, but he had no idea what the guy was talking about. 

"I regret all my life decisions too," Yuuri stated. The two males were talking about entirely different things, and yet, they felt as if they were bonding. Watch out Victor, you might lose Yuuri after all, eh?


	5. Five| Nothing Is Quite Like "Friendly" Naked Men

"Ah, don't you just love that smell of another country?" Victor placed his hands on his hips as he stood outside the entrance to Yuuri's home. He sniffed the air awkwardly before taking a deep breath and exhaling. He wasn't even from Japan, and yet, he acted as if he had finally returned to his long lost family. What a strange guy...

"I can't believe you forced me to come on this fucking trip. I hate fucking hot springs you fucking piece of shit. Let me enjoy my vacation in my fucking room next to my fuc-" the grumbling Yuri was forced to end his complaints when Otabek appeared behind him. 

The male wrapped an arm around Yuri while placing a hand over the blonde's mouth. "Language," he stated. Yuuri wondered if he had done that just so he could hug the blonde from behind. Oh? Could it be? Were Yuri's feelings were reciprocated? Yuuri snickered from afar. The blonde sensed this and made a mental note to torture Yuuri later, as punishment. Never tease Yuri. He will come at you with a thousand pranks, or worse, he'll tease you back. 

"VICTOR!" a little chubby woman ran out the door, arms wide open, to glomp the male.

"HIROKO!" Victor yelled back, opening his arms, and running towards the woman. 

Yuuri:  _Mayday! Mayday! They are on a first name basis! When did this happen?! How much has she told him?!_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Don't worry. We can fix this. All we have to do is kill him tonight. Then it won't be a problem if he knows too much._

Yuuri:  _Excuse me? That is a problem! I can't kill my crush!_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _*sharpens knife* Then obviously you haven't played enough Yandere Simulator..._

"Is that your mother?" Chris asked, "she is so adorable! I want a plush of her! Do they have those? Can I have a plush of your mom? Is your dad this cute too?" Chris's eyes gleamed as he looked towards Yuuri. Yuuri said nothing. He was too busy planning Victor's death to pay attention. Meanwhile, Victor was hugging his mom and twirling around. Were they schoolgirls? About to have a sleepover? It sure seemed like it...

Noticing Yuuri's evil glare, Victor placed the adorable woman down and outstretched his arms to Yuuri, "no need to be jealous! I'd be more than happy to twirl you around too!~" he said. Yuuri snapped back to the cruel reality he was living in and took a step back.

"W-w-what?"

Yuri snickered and looked to Chris. The two stared, communicating silently with their eyes, before nodding. Chris 'accidentally' knocked into Yuuri, while Yuri tripped him and made him fall forward, into Victor's arms. Victor then held Yuuri close and started twirling him around, in the same fashion as prior. 

"You're lighter than I thought you'd be," Victor observed.

Yuuri:  _Well I better be...I've been doing nothing but diet and work out for the past month. Did you think I would just lounge around knowing you'd end up seeing my naked body in the hot spring? No thanks._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _What are you, a girl?_

Yuuri:  _No. But I can assure you, that I would look amazing in a dress. *hair flip*_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _*turns to readers* This guy...if he doesn't get laid in the next few chapters...I'm going to kill the author. I need Yuuri back to normal. Stat. Maybe he will stop being such a noob when he finally gets the D._

Yuuri:  _*slaps Yuuri* Don't be mean to Author-Chan! We need her to continue writing this story!_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Ha! What story?!_

"P-please put me d-down," Yuuri's eyes rolled around in their sockets. He had gotten himself dizzy due to the fact that he wasn't staring at Victor's face, but rather the spinning objects around him. The two were so close together. Their faces were too close together. How was he supposed to survive being naked with this man in a hot spring? If he couldn't even handle nearly kissing him?!

Victor did as he was told, surprisingly. Yuuri, the second his feet touched the ground, ran into his home and straight for the hot spring. He didn't bother taking off his clothes, he just jumped in. He sat there, fully clothed, in the hot spring, and sighed. There is something calming about these outdoor baths. He didn't understand why. Maybe it was just the fact that he was home? Yuuri sunk down into the water, so that he could blow bubbles with his mouth. Now who was acting like a schoolgirl? 

Chris and Victor followed Yuuri, while Otabek and Yuri went to the room they'd be staying in. Well, that they'd  _all_  be staying in. Yuri wasn't pleased with the fact that he and Otabek had to carry all the stuff in, while the three idiots fooled around in the bath. Tch. He'd get them all back somehow. 

"Come," Otabek said, grabbing Yuri's hand to drag him towards the hot spring.

"But I don't want to! I don't like hot springs!" Yuri complained.

Otabek paused, before saying, "if you be nice, I'll buy you a cat plushie of your choice when we get back to America."

"Do you promise?" Yuri puffed out his cheeks and looked to the floor. Otabek didn't say anything, he just grunted, in what Yuri assumed to be a 'mhm.'

The two stripped themselves of their clothing and opened the door to the springs, only to find Chris, Victor, and Yuuri, in a very  _suggestive_  pose. Chris, naked, in front of Yuuri, attempting to take of his shirt. Victor, holding Yuuri from behind, also naked, trying to take off his pants. Yuuri, pink cheeks, with his glasses sliding down half of his face, and wet clothes sticking in all of the  _right_  places. Otabek instinctively covered Yuri's innocent eyes and closed the screen door.

"Sorry to interrupt," he said. 

"W-wait! N-no! It isn't like t-that!" Yuuri yelled, trying to defend himself.

"Well, not  _yet_ ," Chris winked.

"No! Not  _ever_!" Yuuri could feel the tears welling up in his eyes. How was he ever going to survive a full  _week_  of this torture?!

"Aw, but Yuuri, I was looking forward to our future naked fun times!" Victor pouted.

Yuuri:  _K.O._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _You don't want to do that, or I'll push the Ultimate Yuuri button again._

Yuuri:  _Please no._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Then be a man and stay conscious!_

Yuuri:  _Aye Captain..._

"Why'd you cover my eyes?" Yuri questioned.

"Sorry," Otabek paused, with his mouth still open, as if he was going to say something else. However, he closed his lips tightly, and didn't say a thing more.

Yuri crossed his arms, "well, since they are obviously busy, can I wash your back?" Yuri asked, hopeful. If he squinted, he might be able to see Otabek blush. 

The male nodded before replying, "let me wash yours first."


	6. Six| Never Sleep Next To Victor Nikiforov

Yuuri laughed to himself as he mentally planned the day's events. There was only  _one_  place he  _needed_  to take Victor. Ikebukuro...for  _Russian sushi_. He couldn't stop laughing at the thought of taking a Russian all the way to Ikebukuro, for  _Russian_  things. It would be the perfect way to get him back for what happened yesterday in the bath! Who knows, maybe Simon and Victor could have a nice conversation about..well...whatever Russians talk about. Although, it is quite possible Simon is an ex-mobster or something. Perhaps he was (or is) an assassin. How else would he be able to hold his own with the bartender-dressed blonde? In any case. This was a thing that was going to happen.

Yuuri:  _Oh yeah, let me just take you to get Russian sushi instead of showing you authentic Japanese things. Take that Victor._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _You demon. You know Victor really wants to see Japan. He is in mega-tourist-mode right now._

Yuuri:  _I know.~ That's the point!~_

"Yuuri!~" Victor rolled over on the futon to hug Yuuri's torso. Yuuri, who was currently sitting up, had a mental breakdown. Victor's face was right in his crotch. The only thing separating Victor's mouth from the wonderful lil' Yuuri, was the fabric of a yukata. Although, under normal circumstances, Yuuri would have dreamed of something similar, this wasn't exactly what he had in mind. Yuuri tried to regulate his breathing to keep from going into 'fantasy' mode. Good luck Yuuri. You're about to be sleep-molested by Victor. How does that make you feel?

"Heh...Yuuri...you're quite big...aren't you?" Victor nuzzled his face into Yuuri's crotch. What kind of dream are you having Victor? Why must you torture Yuuri so? With that suggestive sleep-talking? Do you realize what kind of situation this is? 

"Bad Victor," Yuuri huffed. He gently nudged Victor off of him so that he could escape. Mission accomplished. That was a lot easier than he thought it would be. Yuuri stood up, only to be conveniently tripped by a certain sleeping Yuri, and fall  _directly_  on top of Victor. Well, would you look at that? Phase Two of Hell is about to begin. 

Yuuri rolled off of Victor, only to be grabbed from behind. Victor kissed Yuuri's neck while one of his hands moved up Yuuri's leg. Yuuri shivered. He wasn't sure which was worse: waking Victor up or letting this continue. If he woke Victor up, he had the sneaking suspicion, that Victor might just continue anyway. He couldn't have that.

"Hm? No underwear..." Victor muttered. Yuuri could feel Victor's breathing, and the touching, but the touching was not helping with the Yuuri trying to remain the calms. Actually, neither was the breathing. But, if he had to choose, he would much rather have just the breathing. No touching. Thx.

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Well shit. You actually are getting some action._

Yuuri:  _I don't want this..._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _We both know you do though..._

Yuuri:  _But there are people in the room. What if they wake up?! That's embarrassing!_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _So?_

Yuuri:  _I don't want to be Chris when I grow up!_

A noise escaped Yuuri. It wasn't loud, thank the sky gods, however, it still happened. Yuuri abandoned all hope. He decided to just pretend to be sleeping too. Yeah. That'll work. If anyone wakes up Victor is in the wrong here. So Yuuri closed his eyes. He could hear someone shuffling about. Was it Otabek? Chris? Yuri? This is the worst vacation ever. 

Yuuri:  _I don't feel Victor next to me anymore. And the touching has stopped too. But I'm still like this...;-;_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Keep your eyes closed no matter what happens._

"Victor. What have you done," Chris asked. So the guy moving around was him. Was that good or bad? 

"It wasn't my fault!" Victor whisper-yelled, "I didn't mean to!"

"How are you going to fix this? You can't just leave him like that," Chris gestured to Yuuri. Yuuri could feel eyes staring at him. He tried his best to remain perfectly still and in a sleep-like state. 

"I can't just continue to molest someone while they are sleeping!"

"Sleeping you had no problem."

Yuuri could hear another person moving about. It couldn't be Yuri, considering Yuri would be sure to comment on the state of Yuuri right now. So it had to be Otabek.

"Why are you picking up Yuri?" Chris asked.

"Victor has to finish. We should give them privacy. If he's lucky Yuuri will never know what happened," Otabek answered. Yuuri could hear the door open and close. So he carried Yuri out of the room then? Sleeping beauty. Cute. Wait! That means Chris is going to leave too! And that Yuuri will still be molested!

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Are you saying you want Chris to join in?_

Yuuri:  _No!_

The door opened and closed again. Was that Chris? Did Chris leave? Well. Yuuri. Looks like you're on your own. Poor thing.

"What am I supposed to do?" Victor whined. Well, maybe you could just not do anything and leave too. That way Yuuri can save himself. There's a thought, "do I use my hands or mouth?"

Yuuri:  _That's what he was worried about? Not about how perverted this is?_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _The band is called 'Hentai Boyz' for a reason..._

Yuuri felt the coldness of the air as his body became exposed. He then felt something warm and wet. That's not good. That's really not good. 

Yuuri:  _Is that Victor's mouth? Did he just choose mouth?_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Well if he chose hands there would be evidence..._

Yuuri:  _I can't keep myself from making noises if he uses his mouth!_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _That's what you're worried about now?_

The poor Yuuri tried his best not to make too many sounds. But he couldn't. Victor ended up placing a hand over his mouth, as if to say, 'I'm glad you're enjoying this but please shut up!' Did Victor have long arms? Or was he good at stretching? I'll leave that up to you to decide. 

Yuuri:  _Is it over now? Can I open my eyes? Is Victor gone yet? No. Wait. The door didn't open. So he is just sitting there casually looking at my naked body?_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Don't you dare get turned on again._

Yuuri:  _Too late._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Are you serious?! You're joking right?!_

Yuuri:  _Now you know how I feel when you're always making stupid comments! Take that!_

Yuuri opened his eyes. Slowly. Carefully. Trying not to make it too obvious that he was awake the whole time. He sat up, yawned, then rubbed his eyes. He looked around the room, to make sure that no one else was there, and then flinched upon making eye contact with Victor. 

"Uhm. Victor? What's on your face?" Yuuri couldn't help but ask. He wanted to see what type of reaction Victor would give. The male's face slowly turned red. He looked to the side, then around the room, refusing to make eye contact with Yuuri.

"Ice cream! Yuri got some and then Chris tripped him and it fell on my face!"

"That doesn't look like ice cream..." Yuuri said.

Victor laughed nervously and stood up, "well, I should just, uhm, go tell the others you're awake!" he stumbled over his feet. Yuuri thought he was going to trip, but he didn't, good job Victor! You've got balance!

The door closed and Yuuri was left alone. It's about time. He held his face in his hands and quietly tried to die. He wanted to die. That was too embarrassing! He wasn't going to sleep next to Victor again! Never!  _No_! 

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _You won't be saying that in a few years. You two will be married and you'll be asking for this._

Yuuri:  _Shut up!_


	7. Seven| We're Going To Ikebukuro. Why? To See The Gay.

"Russian sushi is actually pretty good," Victor said. The five 'band members' walked out of the restaurant and began walking down the streets of Ikebukuro. It was calm. It was peaceful. But, when is this city  _ever_  peaceful? On the bright side, Yuuri was able to forget all about what happened earlier. No more sexy Victor thoughts today! He has had  _quite_   _enough_  of Victor, thank you very much. 

"Stop dick-eating Victor. I bet you haven't had sushi once in your life. I also bet you wouldn't know the difference between  _normal_  and  _Russian_  if someone hit you in the face with a vending machine," Yuri grumbled. He was holding hands with Otabek to keep from getting lost. Otabek was afraid that if he didn't hold Yuri's hand, the male would wander off due to seeing something with a cat on it. The sad part is, Otabek was probably right...

Yuuri:  _Dick-eating?_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Dick-eating. To suck dick. You know? Like what Vict-_

Yuuri:  _*interrupts* You swore never to speak of this again!_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _I didn't swear anything. You didn't play a game with me. We didn't make a deal under the Ten Covenants. We didn't say 'Aschente.'_

Yuuri:  _Whydoyouhavetobesuchanotaku?_

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _I don't see the problem here._

Yuuri:  _Naturally, you wouldn't. T-T_

"IIIIIIIIIIIIIII~ZAAAAAAAAAAAAA~YAAAAAAAAAAA~KUUUUUUUUUUUUN!" the group of five stopped. Where was that yelling coming from? Was it nearby? Or was the person just  _that_  loud? They needn't ask any further questions, because a male wearing a black sweater with fluff-fluff around the hood bumped into Victor. Could this be the said 'Izaya-kun'?

"Hey, aren't yo-" the male stopped mid-sentence, looked around, then hid behind Victor, "cover me," he whispered, "my husband doesn't exactly like the fact I dyed his hair multiple colors last night. If anyone asks, I'm not here, got it?" the male grabbed Yuuri and mushed him next to Victor, making a human shield for himself. A male, dressed like a bartender, zoomed past the crowd. His hair being the colors of the rainbow. The stranger snickered, all according to plan. This was pure  _genius!_  Someone get this on camera! He needed this event to go down in history! As the day he gave his tough-guy husband magical rainbow hair! It's as if he was screaming to the world how gay he really was!  _Brilliant!_

"Who  _are_ you?" Yuuri asked.

The male flipped his hair in a dramatic sense before answering, "weren't you paying attention? I'm Izaya Orihara. And, who might  _you_  be? No, wait, don't tell me," Izaya closed his eyes and thought for a moment. It didn't take long for him to collect his thoughts, "you guys must be 'Hentai Boyz'!" he smiled at the expression of shock on Yuuri's face. How did this guy know who they were? The so called 'band' hadn't even created a  _song_  or made a  _debut!_

"Two Yuris, one Chris, one Victor, and one Otabek, pleasure to meet you," he turned to Chris, "I'm still mad at you for not accepting the position at Svante. Tch. But I suppose you have your reasons. If your band never works out you better come back, 'kay?" he offered, or rather, he  _threatened._

"What are you doing here?! I thought you weren't ever coming back to Japan!" Chris spoke.

"Originally no, but, before we could elope officially Shizu-chan went and forgot some important documents! Honestly, after all that work we put into opening up a shop! He went and left something in Japan! Can you believe it? We had to come back here and act as if we never left," Izaya growled. The male turned his attention back to Victor before saying, "here, take this, you might need it. Gotta dash tho. Sorry folks. Pleasure to meet you!~ Hope to see you again sometime!~ Chris, you better come back to Svante!~" the guy ran down the street at light speed after giving Victor a card. The male stared at it, wondering why it was handed to him. Just who was that guy?

"I feel like I should know him," Yuuri thought aloud.

"He does give off that aura," Victor agreed, placing the card in his pocket. 

The five males silently watched as Izaya ran off, and they all flinched when a vending machine came flying at him. Would he be okay? Yes, he would be, Izaya dodged it. Good for him. He seems well accustomed to this treatment. The bartender continued running after the raven-headed male. Those guys must have a lot of stamina...

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Must be great for se-_

Yuuri:  _*interrupts* Please stop talking or I'll have to get duck-tape._

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _You know you were thinking the same thing._

"I  _knew_  someone could get hit with a vending machine in Japan! I told you Beka. I told you. But you didn't believe me, did you? No, you said it wasn't possible," Yuri pointed at Izaya and the blonde, trying to prove his point. 

"I was right," Otabek stated, "because Izaya  _didn't_  get hit with a vending machine, he dodged."

"That's not playing fair!" Yuri whined.

"Beka?" Yuuri snickered. His ship was sailing. Yuri blushed a bright shade of red in response.

"He said it was fine, dumbass," Yuri huffed and puffed out his cheeks, pouting.

"I didn't say anything," Yuuri snickered again. Yuri took this as a great opportunity to kick Yuuri in the back, causing the male to fall forward, and, evidently, on top of a stranger. The stranger, small, fragile, and with crutches, yelped at the collision with the ground and Yuuri. His eyes were fearful and had heavy bags underneath them. It looked as if he had seen a ghost, or worse, the devil himself. 

"I'm really sorry..." Yuuri apologized. He stood up and offered the guy a hand, only to have his hand swatted away by another male. This new guy was more heavily built, his hair was dyed, and he had an undercut. Yuuri flinched, and took a step back, as if his instincts were telling him to run as far away as possible. The male helped the other stranger up off the ground. He never said a word, but Yuuri feared for his life as he watched the two go on their way.

"What was his problem?" Victor asked. No one answered. No one really knew. But they all tried to forget about it as they made their way to the next place...

Yuuri couldn't forget. No matter how much he tried. He kept looking over his shoulder. He kept jumping at his own shadow. And then, he disappeared without a trace. Victor, Otabek, Yuri, Chris, all looked for him until the day ended, until the sun set. 

But Yuuri was never found.


	8. Eight| Motherfuckin' Tooth Fairy

"Victor, we have been searching this area for hours. Let's just go to the police," Chris stated, placing a hand on Victor's shoulder for comfort, though, it wasn't very comforting. Why do people do that? Make physical contact in times of pain? There must be a reason. But, what is that reason? 

"The police don't do anything," Victor mumbled, hair covering his eyes. The three males standing by him wondered if he had experienced something similar before. No, it couldn't be, right? He didn't seem like the type that had lost someone before. Or, maybe, that was the point. Maybe Victor's 'normal' personality was a facade, a mask, hiding how truly empty he was inside. Victor clenched his fist while sitting on that park bench, in Ikebukuro, wondering what he had done wrong. 

Should they have left the restaurant so soon? Should they have even gone? Should Victor have taken everyone to Japan in the first place? If they had done things differently, would Yuuri still be missing? If only there was a person to tell him what was going on. It was his fault. Wasn't it? That all of this was happening...should he have even talked to Yuuri in the first place? Would it be better if they were still complete strangers?

His cellphone went off in his pocket. Victor didn't want to look at it, but, the smallest part of him wondered if it was Yuuri. Was Yuuri calling him to tell him everything was fine? Did he get lost? Did his phone battery die? Would he apologize for not finding a way to reach them sooner? They'd been searching since yesterday. It was all Chris could do to convince Victor to go back to Yuuri's home last night. Yuuri's family didn't know he was missing, yet. Victor refused to let anyone tell them. He was living in a state of denial. Yuuri wasn't gone. He wasn't kidnapped. He wasn't missing. Somehow, someway, Yuuri was fine. He had to tell himself that. Because if he didn't, well, he'd go mad.

Victor took the ringing phone out of his pocket, unknown caller, "hello?" Victor spoke. He wanted to let the person on the other side know he'd answered. However, he didn't feel like saying much more than that.

"I gave you my number, I thought you might call," the voice began, "but apparently I was too optimistic. I had to look you up myself. You could have saved me a lot of trouble if you had just looked at the damn card! That's why I gave it to you after all."

"Izaya...?"

"No, I'm the motherfuckin' tooth fairy," Victor could almost  _hear_  Izaya roll his eyes, "now that everyone knows who I am. I have news for you. On the back of the card write this address down. Okay? Then go there. That's where your future husband is being held."

"H-how do you know that?" Victor questioned.

"I told you. I'm the motherfuckin' tooth fairy. You don't pay attention very well, do you? Tooth fairies need to know where people live in order to pick up teeth, obviously," Izaya paused, "so I suggest you give me a lot of teeth to pick up," he said, implying that Victor should bash the kidnapper's head in so all of their teeth fell out. Victor felt chills run down his back at Izaya's sudden change in tone. Who knew this guy could be so scary? Victor listened carefully to the address given to him. Luckily for him, Chris had a pen.

"Did you write it down?" Izaya asked. Victor was reminded of a mother. Izaya was a mother, if not, he should be one. Ah, but he has a husband. No, he could still be a mother if he wanted to be. He and his husband simply  _must_  adopt someday.

"Shizu-chan, shut the fuck up, I'm on the phone here," Izaya's voice was muffled, Victor was still able to pick up what he was saying though, "no, I told you, if you wanted something to eat you should of made it yourself," there was a pause, "I don't care if you think I do it better. Flattery isn't going to get me to cook for you. Don't you dare look at me with that adorable pleading face. Can't you see I'm trying to help out this sexy man on the phone here?" Victor blushed at the comment, "Bitch. You should be worried. I just might consider having an affair after you chased me all around the city yesterday. How is that even possible? A man should  _not_  be able to yell at the top of his lungs and run for hours on end. It's miserable, for all people involved."

Izaya cleared his throat before bringing his attention back to Victor, "sorry about that. Did you write it down or not?"

"Do you really think I'm sexy?"

There was a long pause, "Victor, honey, the entire  _universe_  would bow down to that ass of yours. Okay? Okay. Now stop asking stupid questions. Do you have the address?"

Victor nodded. When he realized that he was on the  _phone_  and that Izaya couldn't  _see_  him, he felt dumb, "yes. I have the address."

"Good. Now, is there anything you'd like to say to me before I hang up?" Izaya asked. Definitely a mom.

"I wouldn't mind if I was your mistress," Victor said. No response. How distressing. He was hoping he would get  _something_  out of that. At least a  _bit_  of a reaction would suffice. 

The long silence continued. A different voice spoke through the phone, "my husband kind of died from blood loss due to a nosebleed. If you don't mind, please refrain from flirting with him in the future. Thank you, and good day," the voice said. Victor heard the click of the phone. The guy hung up. Well then. That was a weird interaction. He wished he had gotten a better look at Izaya's husband the day before, he sounded attractive.

Did Izaya really pass out from a nosebleed? Victor was pleased with himself. He had just managed to seduce a man over the  _phone_. That's got to be a new record. He placed his phone back into his pocket and stared at the paper. The three men around him stared, confused, wondering what the hell that conversation consisted of. Victor laughed at all of their faces. Well, he'd have to explain, but he would do it on the way to saving Yuuri.


	9. Nine| Don't Trust Strangers, Okay Kids?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warning for those that don't know the darkness of killing stalking

Yuuri shivered. It wasn't that the air was cold. No. The scenery was cold. The very nature of where he was, was cold. There were blood stains, not his, no, not yet. He was terrified of what was to come. Would he survive? The only thing he had to keep him going was the thought of Victor's face. Victor. Everything Victor. What else could he think about to keep his mind off of where he was? This was a wretched place he had been thrown into. He cringed. Was this a basement? It felt more like a dungeon. 

He'd tried to escape the first night. He didn't get very far. Poor Yuuri. Due to the fact that he had tried, the kidnapper ended up tying him to a chair. Why hadn't he done that to begin with? Did the kidnapper just like toying with his victims? Would Yuuri die here? Without being able to say anything to his family? Or do anything remarkable with his life? How sad. Yuuri didn't want to die this way. He was 99% certain Victor and the others would blame themselves if he did. Sigh. If only he could get out of here...

There was only one more person trapped in the basement with him, the fragile guy, the male he had knocked over in the street. It was because of that male that he was here, but Yuuri didn't blame him. It wasn't as if the guy could control the situation any more than Yuuri could. Bygones should be bygones. That's what Yuuri had decided. Plus, he felt more sorry for the stranger than he did for himself. The male was afraid of his own shadow. 

The two didn't talk. They feared that if they made a single noise the  _other_  man would come down to greet them. That would be much worse than sitting in silence. It was terrifying to think of what  _he_  might do. Yuuri had managed to make it this far without too much trouble; he intended to survive the rest of his trials as well. He intended to escape. He just didn't know how to go about it. He would have to woo the fragile male in order to have any  _hope_  of leaving. But Yuuri already knew that guy was too afraid to even  _try_. So. The future was looking incredibly dim. 

"Bum," a voice spoke. The fragile male flinched as he turned to face the basement's door. It was open, just a bit, but Yuuri couldn't see what was going on from where he was. He just heard the voice. He just saw the male's reactions. Nothing more. Nothing less.

"Y-yes?" 

"Move." The door swung open and the man stood there. He wasn't smiling. He wasn't frowning. He was just  _staring_. Bum scurried down the stairs. He tripped over his feet and fell face first onto the floor. The man didn't even blink. He just walked over Bum as if he was a new carpet beneath his feet. Yuuri wanted to go and hug the poor child. Unfortunately, his hands were tied. Quite literally. 

Yuuri sat in the chair, awaiting whatever was going to happen. He tried to keep himself awake. It was too hard. His eyes shut and opened over and over. Was he drugged? But he hadn't eaten anything in a while. Was it in the air? Maybe he was just sleep deprived. Yeah, that was it. It was probably because he hadn't slept well since arriving here. Kind of hard to sleep when you're sitting in a chair, naked, without so much as a blanket. Yuuri desperately craved a massage. He was stiff from being in this position for so long.

His cheek burned. Had he just been slapped? Now his other cheek burned. Great. This was turning out to be a fantastic day, wasn't it? He just wanted to go home. He wanted to take a bath and a long nap. Maybe he could sleep in Victor's arms. Were they still in Japan? Had it been a week yet? Yuuri couldn't tell. His delusions were getting to the best of him. 

In his mind, Yuuri was famous and married to Victor. As if  _that_  could happen. They couldn't possibly be world famous skaters, could they? But Victor said he wanted to make a band, why would they ever switch careers like that? For no reason? He should be having dreams of being in a famous  _band_. Why was he always thinking of ice skating? Even though he had never skated? Maybe the future was trying to tell him something. Maybe his destiny lied somewhere he didn't expect it to be...

Yuuri felt water being splashed on him. It was cold. Ice cold. He started shivering. Not only was he practically naked but now he was naked  _and_  ice cold. Fantastic. There was no sleeping for him now. Yuuri was wide awake; staring eye to eye with Mr. Undercut. No more delusions. Just straight up misery. 

"Are you awake? Good," he smiled. It wasn't comforting. Yuuri was half tempted to slap him. If only his hands weren't tied. That was certainly the true crime here. 

The man took a step back. He never stopped smiling. He grabbed a knife, it was hanging from the wall, and helped Bum up off the ground. He placed the knife in Bum's hands, then stood behind Bum, whispering something into his ear. Yuuri couldn't hear it, but he knew it wasn't going to end well for him. Bum looked up at the man, fearful, pleading, communicating with his eyes how much he didn't want to do whatever the man had requested.

"Sangwoo, I don't want to kill anyone," he muttered. He started crying. He started shaking. Yuuri was half tempted to kill himself, just to save this poor innocent being before him. 

The man pushed Bum forward, "are you saying you want to be with him more than me? Bum? That can be arranged you know," Sangwoo's eyes clouded. He was planning on killing them both, wasn't he? Yuuri remained silent. His mind was racing. His heart rate increased. He didn't want to die, but how was he going to save himself? Save Bum? Slaughter Sangwoo? 

"Bum, do you love me?" Sangwoo asked. Bum stopped shaking. He took a deep breath and one step forward. 

"Bum, do you love me?" Sangwoo asked again. Bum took another step forward. 

"Bum, do you love me?" Sangwoo asked for the third time. Bum was standing in front of Yuuri. Yuuri had kept his mouth shut, not saying a word, but now he felt the need to speak. Even though he didn't. Instead, he smiled, staring into the scared eyes of the male before him. He leaned forward. Yuuri kissed Bum.

Yuuri to Yuuri:  _Ultimate Yuuri activated. Time to initiate the escape plan._


	10. Ten| It's Amazing How You Never Recognize People

Sangwoo. Where had he heard that name before? Wasn't he famous for something? Hm. He felt like he should know but the answer never came to him. It's amazing how you never recognize the people standing right in front of you, until it is too late. That's what Yuuri thought. Yeah. That's definitely what he was thinking. Because, it was only after he kissed Bum that he realized...

Sangwoo is a serial killer. 

Not just any serial killer,  _the_  serial killer. This is the original. The  _real_  Sangwoo. That net comic seemed cute compared to the angry male standing in front of him now. Yuuri smiled. Even if this was a serial killer, he had nothing on Ultimate Yuuri. Yuuri only needed to show his true potential! But. Even then. He needn't do that. Sangwoo was too busy plotting Yuuri's demise to notice that a man had sneaked in. Yuuri was just a distraction for the true genius here.

"Good~ Even~ing!~" the voice sang. Sangwoo didn't have the chance to turn his head, or to respond in general, the stranger was too quick. He hit the base of Sangwoo's head with a baseball bat. The male fell to the floor. Bum rushed to his side.

"Did you kill him?!" the frail male asked.

"Oh, no, hun, if I wanted to do that, he'd be awake to experience some of the fun!~" the masked man smiled. Bum shuddered. "By the way, are you going to stay here? Or do you want to escape with him?" the male was talking to Bum but pointing to Yuuri. Yuuri blinked in response. What? Had this guy come to rescue him? But he didn't even know this person! How could this person possibly know  _he_  existed?

"I can't do that!" Bum squeaked, "Sangwoo would kill me!" Bum promptly took a chain with a cuff on it and locked himself in. He was now permanently attached to the wall, (I bet Wall-Senpai loves the company). There was no key around so it would be a miracle for him to ever escape now. Yuuri's jaw dropped, who would  _want_  to stay with that maniac?! Bum placed Sangwoo's head on his lap and smiled softly, "besides, I don't have anywhere else to be. He might be messed up, but at least he needs me."

The stranger nodded in understanding. Yuuri just sat confused. This guy should be trying to talk Bum out of it! But he was just perfectly fine with leaving the poor child here! Maybe the stranger was just as messed up as Sangwoo...or worse. What was Yuuri getting himself into?

"Are you going to just sit there? Or are you going to escape? We don't have all day, you know?" the stranger frowned, looking at his wrist. There wasn't a watch but that didn't seem to matter. Yuuri was about to open his mouth and say that his bonds hadn't been broken, but then the ropes holding him in fell to the floor. Woah. When did that happen? Was this guy a miracle worker? Or were his bonds just that weak the whole time?

Yuuri wobbled and tried to stand. He had been sitting there for so long that his legs weren't listening to him. The stranger sighed and picked him up. Despite his height, the male was actually really strong. Wow. Another surprise. Yuuri felt himself falling asleep. He didn't want to so he bit his tongue to regain consciousness. It hurt like hell, but hey, it was worth it. Besides, he was slung over the stranger's shoulder and was finding this guy's butt to be very attractive. Sorry Victor, it seems Yuuri wants to cheat a bit. 'Kay?

The stranger kicked the door off its hinges and ran on the sidewalk towards Victor. The guy was running towards the stranger too. Perfect timing. Victor was just about to find a way into the house, but the man beat him to it. The masked individual smirked before plopping the (mostly) naked Yuuri into Victor's arms and running back in the doorway. He was still visible to Victor&Co when he pulled out a matchbox. Was he going to set the house on fire? That's a bit odd. 

"I think I heard a story like this once," Yuri began, "wasn't there a man on the news whose signature move was burning buildings to destroy evidence?"

"I think you're right. They also said he was a top dog in The Basement," Chris thought long and hard before continuing, "wasn't his name Phantom or something like that?"

"Quite right," the man who had previously been inside the house appeared behind Chris grinning, "my name is Phantom. Pleasure to make your acquaintance," he said, before bowing. "I was in the neighborhood when I got a phone call from someone I owe a favor to. He said it would be a crime to let such an attractive man cry if his future husband died," Phantom winked at Victor, "so I just  _had_  to help. You understand, don't you?"

Victor blushed at the statement. He wasn't sure whether to flirt back or to just leave it alone. Somehow, he thought it would be safer to keep his mouth shut. Chris and Yuri said this guy was pretty dangerous just a few moments ago. But. Then again. Why  _not_  flirt with a dangerous man? You have to admit that's sexier...plus he has a nice butt. Not that Victor was looking or anything! He is devoted to Yuuri!!! (they might not be in a relationship yet but they've already been intimate ^_~ if you remember Never Sleep Next To Victor Nikiforov, and we all know Victor is the type of man to own up and take responsibility for deflowering someone...things are looking good in the future's forecast!~)

"Oh! Look at you blush.~ If I wasn't married already I'd gobble you all up," Phantom smiled. Victor only increased in his shade of rainbow.

"Who the fuck says 'gobble'?" Yuri snapped. Phantom walked over to Yuri and stared at him intently. His eyes glimmered in amusement before he leaned in to whisper in Yuri's ear.

"People that are very intent to act on their desires instead of wishing the other individual would act first. How long have you been yearning, hm?~ Would you like me to help you get some 'enjoyment' sometime?~~" Yuri's face flushed instantly. Phantom took a few steps back and acted as if what he had said was completely normal everyday conversation. Otabek, on the other hand, hugged Yuri from behind and glared at Phantom. He wasn't about to have some stranger steal his hard earned Yuri away from him. Do you realize how long he has been working just to form a conversation with this guy? Too long. That's how long, (lol don't think pervy thoughts Reader-Senpai).

"Well, it has been fun talking to you al-" Phantom was interrupted by a certain Chris kissing him. The male had marvelously planned a sneak attack on Phantom! There was no getting out of this kiss now! Poor guy. But if you are all flirt and no action this kind of stuff happens. Hentai Boyz has room for  _one_  molester, thank you very much. In Chris's eyes, Phantom needs some payback for causing a lot of blushes. Matchmaker Chris doesn't approve when people get in the way of his OTPs for a crack shipping. 

"How long do you think they are going to French kiss in broad daylight?" Victor whispered to Otabek.

"As long as it takes before one of them gives in," Otabek replied.

"Battle of the semes. This could take a while. Get comfy everyone," Yuri sighed.

"Didn't he just say he was married though?" Victor tilted his head to the side in confusion.

"I don't think Chris gives a fuc-" Otabek covered Yuri's mouth before he could finish that sentence.

"Language," he said. Yuri pouted.

~Two Days Later~

"I can't believe we have been sitting here for 48 hours watching two guys mouth-rape each other," Yuri rubbed his eyes. He needed to sleep.

"I have to admit this is pretty informative. I didn't realize that someone could kiss in that many ways," Victor stated, taking notes on Yuuri's naked body, (pen provided by Otabek).

"I feel like I'm getting a tattoo," Yuuri sighed.

"I can't believe the firetruck didn't notice that Phantom was here the whole time. Shouldn't the police have taken him away or something?" Yuri questioned.

"What I want to know is how people can kiss for 48 hours and not need an ounce of air," Otabek stated. Everyone looked at him, jaws dropped. He hadn't said anything since two days ago. And  _that_  was the first thing he said??

"Someone needs to split them up or we are going to miss our plane," Victor sighed. They had spent a week in Japan and it felt like they accomplished nothing. Although, if you think about it, they accomplished a lot. They met the infamous couple Izaya and Shizuo, Yuuri got kidnapped by the equally infamous Sangwoo (his body has still not been found amongst that pile of ashes over there btw), and had a bath in Yuuri's hot springs! Oh, and, I guess they met Phantom too. But. None of the people here find that interesting anymore, considering they have wasted the last two days staring at this duel between him and Chris.

"As much as I would  _love_  to see this become a Guinness World Record, it is time to break this up," Otabek stood up and grabbed the back of each male's collar, picked them up, and split them up. Chris was the only one panting. Phantom wiped his mouth on his sleeve and nodded in satisfaction.

"Have a nice flight, Chris-chan," Phantom said when Otabek placed them both on the ground. He waved as he ran, "don't cause anyone too much trouble now!~ And stay safe!"

"Damn bastard," Chris kicked the dirt, "he completely enjoyed that."

"You did too, by the looks of it," Victor observed, before taking a picture of his notes on Yuuri's body, (it wasn't like he needed an excuse to snap a picture of Yuuri naked baaaaaaaka).

"Shut up! I did not!" Chris pouted, "It was a brutal war! Men like you lot wouldn't understand what I just experienced!"

"I would like to remind you that you started it," Otabek stated simply. Chris didn't say a word after that, and Hentai Boyz made their way back to America. Chris carefully plotting his revenge for the next time he saw Phantom,  _if_  there was a next time...


	11. Eleven| How To Become Famous Overnight. By Victor Nikiforov

"I still don't understand why we are doing this," Yuuri sighs. The whole 'group' is collectively inside the massive Funtom Records building. Yep. That's right. This right here is where the big guys get publicized.  _This_  is the headquarters to where the biggest musical talents are  _made_. Why is Hentai Boyz here? That's the real question. These men haven't even finished a song yet. What is they're purpose in trying to become professionals? How can they possibly think that they'll be as big as Pandora's Butler and Port Mafia?  _When they haven't even finished a song..._

"We don't sound that bad, I'm sure it will all work out," Victor smiled. Stop smiling like that. You don't even know what you're doing here in the first place. Don't drag innocent bystanders into this. You haven't even finished college yet, Victor, what are you doing with your life? Please, get it together. For the sake of the pure and the holy Yuuri, (that's supposed to be a joke because we all know our homeboy over here ain't 'pure' in any sense of the word).

Victor wanders over to the main desk and smiles. He thinks he can just walk into a place like this, without an appointment, and automatically become famous, doesn't he? For shame. Victor, please stop acting like an ignorant rich guy. Because the actual rich guys are going to be very disappointed with you. In fact, I'm sure they are. I'm disappointed and I'm just the  _narrator_. So. What's that gonna tell you about life? I really need to stop intruding on my own stories. Crap. 4th wall repairers, where you at?

"Do you have an appointment?"

"No, bu-"

"I'm sorry, we can't help you if you do not have an appointment."

"B-"

"Sir, please leave, I will call security if I have to," the attendant sighs. Your day hasn't even started yet, why are you already giving people a hard time? That's no way to treat your customers. Mr. Phantomhive himself would be disappointed, (not to mention I'm still disappointed btw. Just saying. Stop making me mad, you fools).

And Mr. Phantomhive himself  _is_  disappointed. That's right folks. The sexy blue-haired male with a vest and a sassy attitude just so happens to be in the building right at this very moment. Why? Because he is the kind of boss that visits regularly to check on how things are going. Besides, this is  _Funtom Records Headquarters,_ did you really think you could get away with that kind of customer service here? You ignorant potato. Fite me.

Vincent walked over to the front desk, he smiled, the standard 'go fuck yourself' smile that just so  _happens_  to be gentlemanly too, "what seems to be the problem here?" he asks. He doesn't even bother to look at the name-tag. That's how much of a badass he is. That's right. Back the eff up because we got the mofo boss up in here. The entire Hentai Boyz crew takes exactly one step back, Vincent's rich man aura is too much for them, (all except Chris. Chris is too busy staring at Vincent's lips, and butt, because no one can stop his fabulous self).

"T-they don't have an appointment, Sir," she gulps. Yeah, you're fired. You should've paid more attention to the fact that Vincent always gives surprise visits. But you didn't, did you? No. And now you're fired. No one will miss you. c: Hope you know that. 

"Did you offer to make one for them? Or even ask them what they wanted to begin with?" Vincent continued to smile, but it was obvious he was displeased, "I bet you didn't, did you?"

"No, Sir," she answered. She was acting all innocent by looking down at her hands and talking in a high-pitched quiet voice. What are you? A third grader? Get yo ass up and outta here. Child. No one needs you at Funtom Records. Thx.

"How long have you been working here?" Vincent asks.

"Two weeks."

"Well, I will have to inform you, regrettably, that you are out of a job," Vincent stated, "I do not tolerate such low quality customer service in my company, goodbye," Vincent raised his hand to waive. She stared at him blankly for a while, he just returned the look and continued waving. Yes, he is serious. Yes, he just fired you. Goodbye. Why are you still here? She grabbed what little items she had on her desk and scurried off. It's about time. Good riddance.

"Did I really just witness someone get fired because of 'low quality customer service'?" Yurio whispered to Otabek. Vincent heard the question but didn't respond to it. He figured it would be less exciting if he told them that the girl had actually been working there for  _three_   _months_  and during those three months, every day she would steal some information on the artists and sell that information to Vincent's competitors. For a while he planted information, but now he was tired of it, and was going to fire her today regardless of what she had done. Good times. Gotta love Vincent.

"Is there something I can help you with?" Vincent asked the group.

"N-" Yuuri began.

"Yes!" Victor cut him off before he could scare Vincent away, "we were going to try and have you sponsor us! We're trying to become a band!"

"Oh? And what's your band name?" Vincent asked. Might as well just skip right to the meat of it. He can't sponsor them if he doesn't know anything about them, can he? Or, does he actually know  _everything_  about them? That's the real question here. Maybe there is a lot more to Vincent than there seems. 

"Hentai Boyz!" Victor grinned, "with a 'Z' because 'Z's are cool."

Vincent struggled to contain his laughter. He really wanted to burst out laughing right then and there, but he didn't, because he is a professional. What would the world think of him if he sponsored a band with this name? Well, that didn't matter, did it? He was going to do it anyway. Sometimes you got to take those 'why the hell not' chances, ya know?

"Okay, let's get started," Vincent said. He gestured for them to follow as he began all the prep work for this endeavor. Sure, he could have had a worker do it, but where is the fun in that? 

"Have we met before?" Chris asked Vincent while they were all walking.

"I don't know," his eyes glimmered as he smiled, "have we?"


	12. Twelve| Hentai Boyz are the Best Boyz

A total of two years had passed since the moment that Chris, Otabek, Yurio, Yuuri, and Victor all walked into that Funtom Records building. Since then, sure enough, they were a big hit. People started off thinking they were a joke, but then they realized the songs had some meaning to them. If you really listened and dissected the songs, things made more sense. The fanbase grew. Hentai Boyz was at it's peak.

Then it wasn't.

The Funtom Company suffered a tragic fate with the announcement of the divorce between Vincent and Rachel Phantomhive. It was all over the media. It was all people were talking about for the longest time. The artists and others that were sponsored by the Funtom Company had two choices: switch or die. They could switch companies and move on, or they could disband and call this the end of their good run. 

Now, the band had all graduated from college and were sitting in an ice skating rink. This had been their new hangout place since they couldn't go to the library anymore. Rather than pick a new library, one of them just decided to go to the skating rink. The others followed, because that's what they were good at. It's just how this group of friends functioned.  

"I feel really bad for Vincent," Yuuri said. "Who knows how long it took him to be successful and now his whole company got destroyed because of his terrible wife and bad publicity. There isn't much he can do to return from that. What about his kid? Is he going to be okay?" 

"I'm sure Vincent will be fine. He has made it this far in life, he will figure something out," Victor assured. 

"But, it's still so sad," Yuuri sighed. "I can't help but worry about him. He was a nice boss. We wouldn't have been so popular if it wasn't for him. All of the other artists in Funtom Records must feel that way too. I just wish there was something we could do."

"We might not be able to do anything for him, but have you guys ever thought about figure skating?" Chris spoke up. The idea popped into his mind randomly and he couldn't stop thinking about if for some reason. If everyone was up for it, they might be able to pursue the sport together. Wouldn't it be funny to perform a Hentai Boyz song on ice? Chris thought so, but then again, Chris thought a lot of things were funny that really weren't that well thought out. 

"What the hell does that have to do with anything?" Yuri glared. Otabek sighed. Yuri's language hadn't improved at all of the last two years. He'd tried everything he could, but the guy simply wouldn't change his habits. 

"Maybe we could come up with a performance and dedicate it to Vincent?" Yuuri suggested. Everyone looked at each other. They couldn't become professional ice skaters overnight, could they? How many hours of youtube videos and googling would that take? 

"That's an excellent idea!" Victor clapped his hands together and stood up on the ice. Their round table session had come to a close, it seemed. Now they'd have to start practicing. This was a disgrace to all of the professionals out there. They knew this, but as long as it cheered Vincent up they didn't care. 

Yuuri had lost count of how many times everyone had fallen on the ice that day. It didn't matter how many times they practiced or attempted it, nothing was going well. Eventually, they all went home after accomplishing nothing. But, the next day they came back, and the day after that, and the day after that, they'd become regulars at this skating rink. They weren't anywhere near becoming professionals but their growing love for skating was enough to keep them coming back. 

"I think we almost have it," Yuuri tried to catch his breath while clinging to the wall of the rink. The others clung too. They only had a few more days left until their scheduled date with Vincent. 

"Almost isn't good enough," Yuri said. He was right, but it was going to be what it was going to be. What else were they supposed to do? They hadn't grown up skating all of their lives. 

"We will just have to give it our best shot," Chris said. He had a point, but they all still wanted it to be the best it possibly could be. Vincent was important to them. 

"We think it's real nice what you're doing for your boss," one of the owners of the ice skating rink said. She held up a sign and smiled. "That's why we decided to publicize this event and raise some money. We want to help him out too."

Hentai Boyz stared at her in shock. None of them had thought about that. Why didn't they think about that? Raising money by making a fool of themselves was one of the best ideas out there! Struck with a newfound motivation, they got back to practicing. They practiced their last few days away so they could give the performance their best shot. When the night finally came, and the crowd arrived, Hentai Boyz was dumbfounded at how large it was. Did they really have this many supportive fans?

Vincent whistled and walked towards the wall of the rink where Hentai Boyz was currently standing. "Those outfits are rather nice," he winked. "I can't believe you did all this just because I got divorced. Is this a celebration? Or a pity party? I can't tell, to be honest," he was holding the hand of his kid, (probably not the best place to take him, but it's fine, Vincent is Vincent and only parents the way a Vincent can). 

"Just enjoy the show," Victor returned the wink. The spotlight shined on them and the music played. Their hard work showed in their performance. The crowd cheered, Vincent clapped, and by the end of it all he was crying. To think that Hentai Boyz would end because of the company shut down. They were too loyal to switch companies, it broke his heart but at the same time he felt valued. 

"Father," the tiny Ciel looked up at Vincent. "I think I like dudes," he admitted. 

"That's perfectly acceptable," Vincent picked up Ciel and placed him on his shoulders. "I think anyone would fall in love with these boys no matter their sexual orientation."

"Hentai Boyz are the best boys," Ciel yelled to cheer them on. 

"Yes," Vincent laughed. "Hentai Boyz are the best boys."


End file.
